Money Talks

Rudoy, a collegiate engineering student, studied up on extracting sound vibrations from inanimate objects and, lo and behold, learned that money really does talk. Using a toy stethoscope and hooking it into amplifiers and then into a computer voice synthesizer, Rudoy says, “I’ve been listening to coins for more than two months.”

Alas, according to the coverage in the Weekly World News, coins are pretty boring.

Rudoy described a few conversations, which amounted to a quarter saying, “You’re going to spend me on that?” and a nickel complaining “Stop banging me against the other coins in your pocket!”

The Weekly World News, of course, is the supermarket tabloid best known for its accounts of space aliens, supernatural phenomenon, and the adventures of Bat Boy, but its personal finance coverage is always fun and enlightening. (I read it so that you don’t have to.)

Obviously, I don’t take the account of Rudoy’s adventure seriously, but I have always believed that money does, indeed, talk.

The problem is that people only think money talks in the purchase of things, and I believe many people would be better off if they would listen to their money at the point of purchase, rather than having the cash send a message based only on what it brings home.

I don’t think money gets into the range of silliness suggested by Rudoy – who found a jealous dime arguing that its holder likes “the quarter better than me, don’t you?” – but I do think it has a few common messages.

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